The Reclusive Lifestyle Isn't a Bad Thing- We All Know This

I think I'm becoming a Mark. Or showing my true MARK colors.

I don't think regular college students are supposed to not do anything about seeing their old high school friends. I was sad at the beginning of college that they were gone, but now, all of a sudden, I realize I'm not picking up their calls all the time, I'm not calling them back, I'm not making plans with them. And I'm not entirely too rattled by that.

Leigha calls, Amanda doesn't (don't mind, we MySpace, whatever), Melissa calls, Karen buzzes, Kevin calls/jumps, Jared calls/buzzes. What do I do, ignore them until one day I think I should call them or say hello. And then I do. But what kind of friend am I to not pick up their phones and not stay in touch and not mind? I loved them, I DO love them, but apparently I don't seem to like showing that or being around that idea very much.

And I'm becoming a freaking recluse. The only person I ever want to talk to anymore is Leah and my parents. I don't even pick up Andy's calls all the time. And a girlfriend/date should always love when they're called, not be deciding to ignore it.

There is no problem to me with only enjoying talking to Leah anymore. I could never find anything wrong in that. But her and my FAMILY being the only ones I ever give a ring?! Carlee counts once and awhile for me when I miss her and want to chat and want to see how she's doing, but STILL- THREE PEOPLE!!!! I should not live my life upon three people. Right? Please say no. That it's okay I enjoy being alone, working group projects, and simply thinking about the people afterwards, not permenantly marking them a soul in my black book. Because that seriously sounds like a bad thing to me right now.

Maybe that's another reason I'm clutching to film so hard right now. I work on my stuff with people, then work on it on my own, we print, we remember, and I move on. It's a career that doesn't require going on a fancy date and then making out with that long-time-boyfriend-fancy-date man until the cows come home. If I was required to do that, my cows would probably come home before the sun even went down.

Hello again, bloggers. I'm out and back for the count with my lovely rants. Thanks for reading and I <3 you all.

Elephants and cows and blind acrobatic film makers.